Someone’s Gotta’ Buy Toilet Paper

In all of the excitement of performing three sold-out shows at the Edinburgh Fringe, it’s easy to forget that we live in a house.

Let me rephrase that.

It’s easy to forget that we have to actually keep our living space stocked with basic necessities like toilet paper, soap, and even Evan’s beloved bran cereal (although it’s really his own fault that it’s gone, because he consumed 5 bowls of it yesterday before watching the opening 10 minutes of Pixar’s Up only to make himself cry, probably to teach himself regret and human emotion once again after abandoning it in his heartless, robotic, rampage through our communal bran flake supply).

Evan Thompson, a heartless robot of a man

So I bought toilet paper. And soap. Now I don’t have to keep secretly stealing what I can only assume is Matt or Adam’s soap and disguising my treachery by any means possible (sorry guys!).  

And I just found out that Pat also bought toilet paper, so now we have plentiful reserves of toilet paper.  

And lo, the bathroom tissue was plentiful

I bet this is all very interesting to our readers out there, but there is a point here.

I think it’s very easy to get caught up in the wonderful, frantic whirlwind of the fringe and forget to take a good look around at this beautiful city and all the people around you (or your obvious lack of bathroom tissue products).

Luke and I took this idea to heart today when we walked down the cobbled streets of Edinburgh all the way to the parliament building, sitting under the gaze of Arthur’s seat, a famous peak in Holyrood park. On our way back, we peeked into a small garden off of the main street. It was a serene little place, nothing like the raucous bustle of High Street. Then we jumped right back into the swing of things, seeing the fabulous rock concert musical The 27 Club, exploring the mysterious phenomenon of rock stars dying at the age of 27.

All in all, we didn’t escape the Fringe for long, and tomorrow morning will come with its routine but electric rush of set up, performance, strike and publicity.

But the thing I need and want to keep reminding myself is that our trip here is much more than hurdling to the finish through our early-afternoon performances. I want to be sure I realize that I am actually living through this

We need toilet paper to live, and, maybe in buying that, or in living through one terrifying night without it, 

Absolute, abject terror

we can step off our happy little cloud (where I still sit quite contentedly nearly all the time on this trip) and really take in all the little details that I hope I will never forget. 

-Mark Watter aka John Hinckley

(Our scribe less than 5 minutes after finishing this post)